A first date is nothing. It’s a meet and greet, and too many people try to jump right in to something serious. This process just slows that down A LOT.

In regard to both points one and three, The Blues Man certainly happened way too early, and I found myself repeating patterns that led me to my relationship with my husband. This certainly was not my therapist’s intent. I have been feeling like I’m moving past the point of just dating lately, and you’re also correct that giving sneak peaks into what happens beyond the first date would allow my readers to see me more for who I really am, and not just a woman who slams a guy for some small detail after a date.

On point two, I am dealing with this right now, and although it’s awkward, it hasn’t been a dealkiller for the man in question. I have stopped telling guys that I’m writing about my dates before the first date because of what happened with Man #13 and Man #17. They were obviously in it for the fame by proxy and then got upset when I didn’t write what they thought I should write. In both cases, the situations got scary. With Man #13, he kept sending me these really long, stalkeresque emails, telling me all the reasons why he was right and I was wrong. I soon realized that his need to be right and need for control were not worth the drama, so I took the part he found offensive out and blocked him from any further communication. With Man #17, he wanted the fame and had told his friends and coworkers that he was going to be in the blog. Then, when I wrote the post, it ended up having unintended consequences for one of his coworkers, and I, ultimately, took the information down. It’s one thing to write something where it can’t be traced back to a particular individual. It’s another when people get hurt, and it was never my intention to do that. The desire for fame is dangerous, especially in date blogging.

I’m leaving your third digit alone.

1) You’re right. I like it when you follow the rules. But you know me, so that can hardly be surprising. Plus, how cool will it be after you’re done to say, “I did something no one else has done!” Even if someone has, they almost certainly won’t have done it as well. And with the Blues Man, I think a lot of that was A) how early it happened; and B) the fact that you were breaking one of your doc’s rules (remember?).

2) Pointers for letting a good guy know: first of all, make sure he knows that the reason you’re telling him is because you like him enough to want to see him again. Blog fodder candidates don’t get told. Secondly, tell him while your intention is to date 100 men, that isn’t set in stone. Make sure he is familiar with your vow not to throw away a good man just ’cause you haven’t hit the magic third digit (ha ha that sounds dirty). But definitely be honest and tell the guys you’d like to date again, because this will also help weed out the groupie or “famous by proxy” type. A good man will be proud to be a part of what you do, but won’t want to take it over (e.g., by enforcing editorial prerogative).

3) Negativity/Pickiness: uh, it’s your blog, so you should do it how you see fit. Your points about the yawnfest potential of a “no chemistry” post are dead on. But what might shake things up a bit (specifically with those you choose to date more than once) is including one of the things that made you realize a second date was going to happen. I don’t think you need to (or should) blog about those additional dates with the same man/men, but if he’s a winner, throw us a bone and let us know why.

I could say more, but I won’t ’cause it’s not my blog. But you did ask!